Mark-IV

A frozen vision and a restless mind…

2009-04-30T12:25:00.001-07:00

Not just another boring day at work, but it is getting worse with days on the go. It all started a week ago, maybe a little earlier too.. One fine week i work extending my timescale, except for one day.. That day was a miniature of heaven. Thanks to the government for announcing a state wide strike last Thursday. They said that it was for the innocent Tamils suffering in Sri Lanka, but I don’t really care for what they stated as a reason. instead they just helped me out for a day out of work. It was a nice day. And oh, Friday came by with so much ease, just for itself. The series started that day. A boring and a long day at work again. Had some issues with the performance of the application i support. Had to pull in all my wits just to identify that i cant do that anymore and handed the task over to my counter-team at the Client site. The most happening thing after that.. huh.. I missed my last shuttle to home… Had to book the late night cab, which was nearly 2 hrs away from that time. It was as usual, boring and I had no other option but to interact with some of the people from client side and was trying not to talk about any Work or Task assigned to me or my team. Thankfully the day got over before the next day could start over. But yeah, Saturday was no exception, had to work compensating the Thursday off which was given. A weekend where i had to work even if there was no off declared for the Thursday. I had to report at 1PM and to leave work at 9PM. Adding fuel to the flame, I had to get back to work on Sunday at 6AM. Saturday, the day I had to kill time without thinking about anything but work. Left office at 9PM (you see that? first time i left on the time I'm supposed to ..). Sunday was the day, where i had to kill time like i had never done before.. How can one blindly accept to work on a weekend that too a Sunday, the only day we professionals get for ourselves. The travel in the cab to office is where I had to experience this new symptom of a frozen vision, where the image of something that had moved, actually was still in my vision at the very own place it was before. Just think about this, You are in the co-driver’s seat, and there is this truck in front of you and you have this super cool visual effect. A small level tremor in my mind. As a matter of fact, I felt restless. And this seems to continue over and again for this week also. Making me work on May-1st, a public holiday out here.

Its a pathetic life, without a definition for anything in it..

What i used to love, i started to hate. What i used to dream, i started to shatter it myself. What i had to do for myself, I'm having to resist that.

PS: I so much, love all those business urgency emails stating that the next Saturday is also declared to be just another working day.

*-Cheers-* with the broken Glass-

To be or not to be

2008-11-03T20:03:00.001-08:00

Can anyone aim towards no target? Can anyone keep traveling without a destination? Well, i can and i am... For the past few months, i've been doing the same.. Taking everything towards the wrong direction, or been taken to the wrong direction.. Be it at work or outside at work considering the little time i get for myself outside my workplace.. Its not that we cant do anything, but its just that we dont aim at something before we start our action for anything.. While at work, do we see the impact of what happens after we work on some issue we were working on? Not all of us do that, its just a remedial measure we do, but not a permanent solution we create. Life is no different when compared to that, but in this particular case, the human mind tends to be more selfish and it does not let us think anything other than what happens to us. Each and every move we make, does something outside our control, those who realize it later will only try to avoid such situations, but not succeeds in that everytime. Why am i quoting such thing? Well, there was a particular incident that happened yesterday to me, where i brought a totally out of the scope team under pressure without my knowing.. I was trying to cover up myself since i was already under a high pressure from the higher authorities when they are supposed to be a support to me but missed to be so, which resulted in me not communicating the other teams clearly. Which was then escalated. This is with respect to work. While some people around me for sometime now, they dont even think how i'll react to how they talk or not talk or the way they move. It hardly takes a minute for everyone to respond in good sense, but when they miss it, the way anyone(me in this case) get it, totally falls under the other category. I dont call it as a problem from their end, but the way it gets into my head is totally different. They do it knowingly or unknowingly, but i take it as they do it knowingly unless a perfectly practical reason is quoted. I said a reason not an excuse. What do i say to everyone with this post? I would like everyone of you, to be more careful with every move you take, let it be personal or professional, make yourself clear and please make a much clearer communication to others when you are doing, because everything that happens comes with an impact. TY

Photo-blog

2008-08-18T10:51:00.001-07:00

Fragile

2008-06-03T09:04:00.000-07:00

If blood will flow when fresh and steel are one
Drying in the colour of the evening sun
Tomorrow's rain will wash the stains away
But something in our minds will always stay
Perhaps this final act was meant
To clinch a lifetime's argument
That nothing comes from violence and nothing ever could
For all those born beneath an angry star
Lest we forget how fragile we are

On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are how fragile we are

On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are how fragile we are
How fragile we are how fragile we are

Relating to the Self

2008-05-10T22:12:00.000-07:00

Relationships are how we relate to others. We have a relationship with everyone that we know and who are close to us. This is not reserved for our family or someone that we are involved with. Every interaction we have with another is the act of relating. If we have a problem relating to others, this affects our ability to have supportivie relationships.
We have to ask ourselves if our relationships are supportive and if they are not, then ask ourselves why they are not. Everyone wants the perfect romance or marriage, but not everyone looks at the mechanics of how to have one. If we fail to have supportive relationships in our life, how can we have the ‘perfect love relationship’?
Lets look at what is a supportive relationship. The word support is very important. It means that our interaction supports another. This means more than supporting another in their decisions or actions, rather through the act of supporting, we honour and validate who the other person is. In turn, this validates who we are. Both are supported, no one loses, no ego’s involved, and in so doing, we honour the relationship. This is what it means to have a supportive relationship. This is the desired goal. Now, how do we accomplish it?
There are several reasons why we may have problems relating to others. One primary reason is our behavioural patterns. These patterns are developed over a course of our lives. It starts when we are children, through to our adolescence, and by the time we are an adult, we have established our behavioural patterns for our relationships. These behavioural patterns either work or they don’t. It is how we interact or respond in our relationships that determine whether these patterns work. In addition, we can have both positive and negative behavioural patterns. Which is reflected in our life? The positive or the negative?
What causes negative behavioural patterns? If we look at a person’s life, we can readily see which is negative or positive behaviour. But we may not easily see the cause of the negative. The cause usually resides in the past in which a trauma or an event occurred that effects how we behave in the future. If that event occurs again, or if something happens currently to cause us to experience that trauma again, that is when we respond to it. Situations can act as triggers, which may cause us to react to the person that is involved in the situation. This causes a negative behavioural pattern. Until we can identify the problem, we are powerless to do anything about it.
Whatever the situation was to trigger a reactionary response,
the cause must be discovered in order to heal the original fracture. (Or stop the behavioural pattern.) In Shamanism terms this is called a Soul Fracture. A fracture of the Self. Each self is part of the whole which comprises the soul.
Soul Fractures occur for a variety of reasons and may or may not relate to this current lifetime. Traumas have occurred in past lifetimes that may or may not have been addressed. The Soul holds the body of these life experiences. Furthermore, the life process itself can be very painful for some. Past experiences that have dishonoured, or invalidated who we are, cause us to close ourself off even more. These experiences build up over a matter of time and unless a clearing occurs, emotional or physical problems may develop. We can go through life accruing more and more garbage. And we can bring this into our relationships. These are just a few reasons why we can have problems in our relationships. Using this context, we can see the long road to having supportive and loving relationships.
If a problem has been indentified, what can we do about it? One can try to clear it themselves, or one can go to a practioner who is adept at doing clearings. Either avenue can work. If someone is able to clear it themselves, it is more benefical for them in how they will address problems in the future. This is a long process and one that is very involved.
In order to clear, one must identify the original cause that created a behavioural pattern. Then, move through the experience of that situation, and experience the emotions that we have associated with it. Then, we must have closure or completion. (This is the doing part of it. We must do something about it.) This means completing it anyway that we are able. As long as, we feel that we have a sense of completion for the experience.
For example, if the experience has to do with a person or a loved one that has died, we may not have the ability to directly talk to this person. But we can still communicate whatever is necessary to say to that person. In this case, the communication will have to be enough.
A word of caution: If someone has or has reason to believe that they have experienced a severe trauma, they should not move through it by themself. They should seek professional help in addressing this. There is too much danger in causing additional harm to oneself in going through it alone.
So, after we have identified the cause, moved through the experience, experienced the emotions associated with it, received closure or completion, then we let it go. We must let it go in order for the experience to clear. When we let it go, we release it. This does not mean to forgive or forget, that is not what it is to release. The act of releasing is our readiness to heal. Only after the experience has cleared can healing occur. The healing process is a time when we must be very loving to ourself. If we beat up ourself about the experience that had caused us harm or our past reaction to it, then we can not heal. In being lovingto ourself, we validate what we had expereinced at that time and our emotions for it. Our emotions are always valid. So its important for us to do this self validation in order to heal.
Love is the energy that helps us to heal, whether we give this love to ourselves, or we receive it from another. When we look at having supportive, loving relationships in our life, why not start with ourself ? Because that is where love comes from. It’s not about what we can receive from love but what we can contribute or give to love. This is what transforms our relationships and our lives. We must love the self first. And we cannot do that until we have healed and become whole.

0 to 100 Degrees of Heat!

2008-05-04T21:36:00.000-07:00

This is not just the change in temperature, but in Reality its Life!
No one can just have a good Fresh climate in their life, as Seasons(time) change in life, we do get to notice a considerable change in people, objects and almost everything around. We then feel the world is changing, forgetting the fact that we ourself changed our perceptiveness. Its "we" changing the way we see the world. How can life be the way we want it to be when we just see what we wanted to see?
I remember these words in everyday life. If we just see what we wanted to see, the outer world is so changing, and making us feel the difference, but when we change the way we look into it, we get to go with people, objects and every other theing we felt like it has changed.. This change, in our life is something we have to get along with to make ourself moving with the pace of the world. If we be even a bit faster in this race of changes, the world gets boring. If we stay even a little slow, the World goes very much unknown as time goes by. Thats the only reason for us to stay with the world in this race... Make yourself steady, strong and motivated in the right way so that, In the End we feel the freshness even at the most toughest situation we come across. It is not as simple as eating a piece of Cake, but can be made simple with the right perception.
Let life be Beautiful!!

Work for a Cause/Reason in General!!! and I worked for my Friend!!!

2008-05-01T10:08:00.000-07:00

They Defined Biology!!!

New Show!!! Laser Show!!!

2008-05-01T09:55:00.000-07:00

Clicks and Mix

2008-04-22T23:39:00.000-07:00

Here are some of my clicks + a little Photoshop touch over them...

Colors of Chennai (Clicked on the move)

The Purple Skyline (Clicked near my workplace)

Heat vision of cool temperature (Clicked at Manali)

Random Design - 1

2008-04-19T14:30:00.000-07:00

My Random Click - 2

2008-04-19T13:07:00.000-07:00

My Random Click - 1

2008-04-18T23:52:00.000-07:00

Photography!!!

2008-04-06T01:12:00.001-07:00

Here are some of my clicks...

Photoshop!!

2008-04-06T00:55:00.001-07:00

These are some of my designs... :)